Monday, April 04, 2005
The Rules
So I went to Dunkin' Donuts for my caffeine/sugar fix and I ran into a lady in line.
She says to me, "Good mornin'."
I say to here, "Good mornin'."
"How're you?" she says.
"Fine. Yourself?"
"Well not so good." And she proceeds to tell me about how miserable her allergies are making her. I commiserate and this just seems to encourage her.
I guess no one told her the rules of engagement.
If a complete stranger asks you how you are doing, if you aren't doing well, lie. I mean I loved this woman in the way I love all mankind, which is to say not much before my morning joe, but well enough afterwards, but I don't want to here about her nasal drippings.
If you are in an elevator then you do not make eye contact except perhaps briefly when you first get on.
If someone you barely know shows you a picture of their kid then ooooh and ahhhh appropriately, even if they're as ugly as that brown stuff that collects under your fridge. (oh come on, no one mops under there)
Understand that I don't think this is lying per se. It's good social skills, in my humble. No sense in starting a war without provocation, unless you happen to be Republican. ¶
2:24 PM
So I went to Dunkin' Donuts for my caffeine/sugar fix and I ran into a lady in line.
She says to me, "Good mornin'."
I say to here, "Good mornin'."
"How're you?" she says.
"Fine. Yourself?"
"Well not so good." And she proceeds to tell me about how miserable her allergies are making her. I commiserate and this just seems to encourage her.
I guess no one told her the rules of engagement.
If a complete stranger asks you how you are doing, if you aren't doing well, lie. I mean I loved this woman in the way I love all mankind, which is to say not much before my morning joe, but well enough afterwards, but I don't want to here about her nasal drippings.
If you are in an elevator then you do not make eye contact except perhaps briefly when you first get on.
If someone you barely know shows you a picture of their kid then ooooh and ahhhh appropriately, even if they're as ugly as that brown stuff that collects under your fridge. (oh come on, no one mops under there)
Understand that I don't think this is lying per se. It's good social skills, in my humble. No sense in starting a war without provocation, unless you happen to be Republican. ¶
2:24 PM
